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Nov 08, 2009

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Long Distance Relationships
Nov 08, 2009

Long distance relationships - Do they work?  Many people will shudder and cringe at the mere notion of a relationship, such as this, where other people may openly laugh and scoff at such an idea.  Many believe that long distance relationships will always fail, that they can never work.  Is this true?  Is your long distance relationship doomed from the start?  Long distance relationships are certainly not for everyone but, for some, they are a valuable method of keeping Love’s pilot light lit.

So how do you make a relationship work, despite the miles between you?  There are several important things which are needed in your relationship, in order to make this work.  The most vital aspect of all of these is trust.  Without trust, you have nothing to build your relationship off of, and you certainly lack the adhesive that will keep you two together, for any long period of time.

When dealing with a long distance relationship, you must have complete trust; trust in yourself, trust in your partner, trust in the love that the two of you share and trust that your partner is filled with the same feelings.  Lacking trust will cause a breakdown of communication, suspicion, jealousy and could very well spell disaster for your relationship.  Trust is essential in any relationship, but all the more important in one such as this.

In order to have trust, you must also have honesty and respect.  Being up front with your partner and not keeping secrets is very important; secrets have a bad habit of just slipping out and causing havoc at the worst of times.  It’s far better to just tell the truth, rather than having a lie, no matter how insignificant it may seem, slap you alongside the head.  Ensure that your partner understands the need for complete honesty and respect as well. 

Communication is essential.  Not only is it the backbone of a long distance relationship, but it’s also important to have good communication before distance is even a factor.  You and your partner must communicate your wants, your needs, and what your goals are with this relationship.  Are there any certain expectations being made of one another?  Is this an open relationship where it’s alright to date other people and, if so, what are the boundaries and limitations with that?  What will you do during holidays?  How do you plan on staying in touch and how often?
 
Now that you have the difficult aspects figured out, how do the two of you plan to keep in touch?  There are a wide variety of options available now; you can talk on the telephone or send letters and cards via snail mail, but more and more people are taking advantage of the lesser expensive option of sending email to one another.  Care packages are also popular, where partners can send one another videos, mixed music tapes, treats, holiday items, etc.  You can be as creative as you would like and, remember, variety is the spice of life; don’t feel you always have to send the same old thing, day in and day out.  Your partner is sure to love an unexpected gift such as a box of his cookies or a teddy bear on her birthday.

For many, long distance relationships are a no-go but, sometimes, they prove to be the perfect answer.  If you wish to retain your relationship across the miles, you may meet with a great deal of controversy but stick fast to your guns.  If you can maintain a long distance relationship until the two of you are rejoined, it will be well worth the effort. 










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